EP (Enema Procedure)

POISONOUS CUNT

IT’S SOLSTICE 2017 AND IT’S HOTTER THAN SATAN’S BALLBAG – SO WHAT BETTER TIME TO BE DROPPING THE DEBUT SMASHER FROM LAHNDAHN’S ONE AND ONLY POISONOUS CUNT? SO HERE GOES AND FUCK YOU.
SINCE FORMING AT THE BEGINNING OF THIS YEAR THE THREE GIRLS AND THE ONE WITH A DICK HAVE BEEN LEAVING AUDIENCES BATTERED AND BRUISED AT THEIR UNMATCHABLE LIVE SHOWS, SO BOW BEFORE THE SHEER POWER OF THESE FOUR TRACKS. WITH MORE DESTRUCTIVE POWER THAN A BRICK IN A WASHING MACHINE IN A TANK DROPPING FROM A PLANE, THIS IS MUSIC TO SLAP YOUR NAN’S CLIT RIGHT OFF HER MINGE….
“SICK” OPENS PROCEEDINGS WITH ALL THE RESTRAINT OF A WOLF FIRED FROM A CANNON. BE SURE TO TURN UP YOUR SHITTY STEREO AS LOUD AS IT WILL GO OR FOREVER BE KNOWN AS A FLOPPYCOCK. TURBOCHARGED GUITARS COLLIDE WITH DRUMS OF DEATH TO PROVIDE THE MUSICAL BATTERY BEHIND LANDMINEDINE’S VERBAL BULLETS, WHICH ARE AIMED INDISCRIMINATELY AND ARE GUARANTEED TO CAUSE GAPING WOUNDS FOR ALL THE FAMILY. AND YES, THAT IS A FUCKING THEREMIN, DO YOU WANT A FIGHT ABOUT IT? NEXT UP IS “NARCOMANIAC”, THE AURAL EQUIVALENT OF BEING FORCED TO EAT SAND. LET’S FACE IT, YOU ARE A CUNT AND ENTIRELY DESERVE THE BRUTAL PUNISHMENT THIS TRACK WILL FOIST ON YOUR SORRY ASS. DON’T EXPECT TO BE ABLE TO SIT DOWN FOR A WEEK, IF EVER.
IF YOU HAVE LISTENED THIS FAR AND ARE STILL NOT DEAD, THIS WILL BE FURTHER TESTED BY “ALEXIA”, THE STORY OF WHEN SEX-MISTRESS AND POISONOUS CUNT DRUMMER WAS CHATTED UP IN RHYME BY A HORNY MEMBER OF THE MIGRAINES. HIS BODY HAS NEVER BEEN FOUND. AS A BONUS, THIS TRACK FEATURES THE ONE AND ONLY BAMBOS WHO ASSISTS THE CUNTS IN CLEARLY INSTRUCTING YOU, THE LISTENER, TO JOIN US IN THE ONE THING IN LIFE THAT TRULY MATTERS: GETTING FUCKING WASTED. FINALLY, WITH YOUR VERY SANITY HANGING ON A THREAD, THOSE OF YOU WHO WERE THROWN OUT OF THE SAS FOR BEING TOO HARD MIGHT JUST HAVE THE STAMINA TO GET TO “ENOUGH”. WRITTEN BY HAZZA, WHOSE SURNAME IS NOT BUT SHOULD DEFINITELY BE DUSS, IT IS A BELTSANDER TO THE GENITALS TO EVERYONE WHO IS NOT ALREADY PROSTRATE IN FEAR AT THE PROSPECT OF THE COMING AGE OF TOTAL DOMINATION OF ALL THINGS BY POISONOUS CUNT. IF WE APPLY MOTORHEAD’S LAW, SET BY LEMMY’S FAMOUS QUOTE THAT IF HIS BAND MOVED IN NEXT DOOR YOUR LAWN WOULD DIE, THEN IF POISONOUS CUNT MOVED IN NEXT DOOR YOUR BOLLOCKS WILL SWAP PLACE WITH YOUR EYEBALLS AND YOUR SKIN WILL MELT OFF. NOW, DO NOT PASS GO, DO NOT COLLECT £200, DO NOT PROCEED DIRECTLY TO JAIL, SIMPLY GO TELL EVERYONE YOU HAVE EVER AND NEVER MET OF THE GLORIOUS MAGNIFICENCE OF POISONOUS CUNT, OR TAKE THIS ENORMOUS BAG OF GIGANTIC DILDOS AND GO FUCK YOURSELF. LOTS OF LOVE, XPXCX 2017.
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  1. 1 Sick 02:42 Info Buy
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  2. 2 Narcomaniac 02:17 Info Buy
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  3. 3 I Wanna Have Sex Wiv Ya 01:22 Info Buy
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  4. 4 Enough 02:19 Info Buy
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